It Boggles The Mind

Facebook is truly amazing. Untold possibilities seem to spring forth with each new day.

Today's example: In a casual, public forum, a young man leads into suggesting a date with a young woman via mentioning an exorcism, describing a prayer revival, and dropping a Narnia quote.
Like a bizarre formula, bathed in religious under(and over- and mid-)tones, demonstrating:
1) fearless conquest of dangerous powers,
2) gentle but enthusiastic generalized hope,
3) cultural relevance.
Then (bam!) "Hey, wanna go out sometime?"

She'll probably marry him.

Humor Based On Bodily Functions Makes Me Laugh*

Juvenile, but oh, so funny:


*This clip, like so many other things of this nature, is really much better when enjoyed with others. Watching it alone and skeptical on a sober, drizzly winter morning -I fear- might strip it of its inherent brilliance. So, you know, consider context. That's all.

Absent

I spent the last few days as follows:

1) Having fun.

2) Sleeping in.

3) Picking up job applications.

4) Half-heartedly considering starting a snowball fight I knew I would lose.

5) Driving.

6) Working a little bit on a lot of puzzle.

7) Watching other people bowl.

8) Starting to fill out the applications I picked up.

9) Having coffee with a few different friends.

10) Eating Sour Patch Kids and popcorn.

11) Avoiding healthy breakfast foods.

Good Point

I read this here and thought it was interesting.

"You can be so interested in great theological and intellectual and philosophical problems that you tend to forget that you are going to die."

-Martin Lloyd-Jones, Preaching and Preachers, p. 193.

Stranger Things

Even though I've been a little bored this week in some ways, I've also been amused by some odd moments that have reminded me not to take my life for granted. A few examples, some recent and some less so:

• While talking to my sister tonight on the phone we realized that we were in similar positions: she is alone in her house in Spokane (roommates are out of town) with the dog, I am alone in my house (mom is working the night shift) with the cat. Before we could get much further, we both, at the exact same time, jumped to the metaphor of cells dividing (like in mitosis, with replication, division, etc.). Anyway, maybe it was one of those things you had to be there for, but seriously: telepathy. The only explanation.

• Today at work there was some hubbub surrounding a big party tomorrow featuring a mechanical bull. There were issues involving property managers, antique floors, weight distribution specifications, and various conversations and gestures depicting what, exactly, is involved in mechanical bull riding. It was funny because nobody was trying to be funny, just trying to get the bases covered.

• Sometime in the last week or so I received in my inbox an email, with no subject line or written content of any kind, simply an attachment with a photo of my boss handing a certain female presidential candidate a birthday cake. [This cake-presenting occurred several months ago, and I am pretty sure we had access to the photo at the time.] He sent it out again likely for no other reason than he thought we might like to have a copy. You know, to, like, print and frame and put on the nightstand. Or something. I am desperately tempted to post it here, but it's a bit too risky.

• One time in Croatia I saw a young, physically fit man wearing a hard hat and riding a pink scooter.

• Another time in Croatia I saw an elderly man, strolling along and smoking a pipe while pushing an empty baby carriage.
  

I like this picture.

In September the fam went to the coast for a weekend, and one evening we were out enjoying the sunset and flying a kite in some impressive oceanic wind. My brothers spontaneously conspired to tie my sister and I up in the kite string (it was still way up in the air). They criss-crossed and circled and we were wound tighter, but in the middle of this Kerri snapped a few shots and got this one of Tobin leaping over the string Tim was holding. Mainly this picture just makes me think of how hard we were laughing.

More of the Same

Work was boring again today. There was actually quite a bit more to do, and the rest of this week should keep me busy. But my mind was flatlining - the kind of boredom that comes not from lack of activity but from lack of giving a darn.

On another note, is this not one of the cutest children you've ever seen in your life?

One Year Ago

This evening I tried to remember what I was doing exactly a year ago and after nailing down the dates realized that (depending on whether you go with numerical date or day of the week) this is what I was doing! Fun memories, to be sure.

State of the Union, or, How Things Are Going at the Office

This week is pretty slow at work. I’m feeling unmotivated in a vast array of ways – not least among them being that there’s not much to do, and since I quit/put in my notice I’m essentially just waiting out the next 1.5 weeks. But something in me can’t tolerate sitting and literally doing nothing, nor can I bring myself to stop caring altogether. So today I scrubbed some nasty toilets and added some decorative touches (candles, vases, etc.) to one of the bathrooms.

Yesterday, though, I was all ready to head home at 3:00. The only other person in the office was leaving, too, because there was nothing left that really needed to be done. But alas, at the last minute the boss came in to get ready for a party that was happening later that night and was in kind of a predicament because there were some things he expected to find prepared in the kitchen that were not prepared. So I spent around 2 hours meticulously sorting through tiny pieces of fancy lettuce, discarding the wilted, rotten leaves and delicately blotting off the nicer leaves to make sure they were clean and presentable. Did I mention that this lasted 2 hours? Because that is 120 minutes, just so you know. And it was right around 40 degrees in the kitchen because there is no heat source other than the ovens in there, and nothing had been baking anytime recently.

I was wearing my coat and trying to make the best of it. But my nose kept running, so I kept dashing out every 10 minutes or so to blow it and then wash my hands again. I have poor circulation to begin with, and my hands were freezing! I felt like a cripple as I methodically selected and dabbed each bite of some wealthy diner’s salad with my ever less-nimble fingers. Then I tacked on another half hour or so making tomato roses to decorate plates. I’ve never gotten to help in the kitchen before, so, to be honest, it was an interesting change of pace. Other than the cold, it was decently fun I suppose.

P.S.

In writing about my time in Budapest/Vajta (i.e. the middle of nowhere) and how it felt like returning to my life in Croatia, I think I failed to clarify that I know it was quite different from actually returning to Croatia. That will bring a whole new set of feelings, I’m sure, whenever the time comes – maybe this summer sometime?

Coming so close did make me wish very badly that I could make it to Rijeka while I was over there in that part of the world. Anyway, I just wanted to say that of course I still miss the actual city that was my home. Most of all, I still miss my Croatian friends who I will most likely not ever share a country with again, but will only be able to visit or host for shorter periods of time.

“I was so fat I couldn’t even stand to look at myself…”

This was but one quote from a slew of quick fix weight-loss drug commercials on television this evening.

Another memorable claim:

“Eat whatever you want and STILL lose weight!!... We couldn’t say it on TV if it wasn’t true!!”

Really? Do people actually believe that? That television is a leading, self-verifying source of credible truth?

Everyone knows that the INTERNET is where you go for solid facts.

There and Back Again

The trip to Hungary was good- really good, in fact. Unfortunately, after that first night the internet situation was reduced to sporadic access to email, and general browsing/loafing around the broader interweb was fairly restricted.

It was great to see some old friends again, and make new ones. You’re probably thinking Wow, look at Alexis getting all social on us. I had a lot of fun, though.

Beyond enjoying the people and helping out with the conference, it was a significant time for me on a personal level. It felt so natural to be back in Eastern Europe – in a familiar location, with familiar faces. There was a sense of closure in returning to what was (essentially) my life, after gaining a bit of distance over the past 5 months, in order to more deliberately say goodbye.

Of course, there were a lot of tossing and turning emotions involved, too. I was letting go, again, of things already gone. Being there and feeling so comfortable was like remembering who I was after a long time sleeping. And it was a time of reconciling who I was with who I am and remembering that I am one person, and that the dimension of time cannot be escaped or abandoned. I am not returning to the past, nor do I want to. It's just that with all of the big changes and transitions that have dominated my time in Seattle so far, I haven’t quite yet achieved a sense of belonging, of presence, of home. But I think I’m finally ready, now. Ready to set my feet firmly on the path and start breathing the air like a native.

The Blue Danube

Miraculously, I'm in Budapest. On Friday night I was about ready to head to bed when some complications arose. As I was doing some final packing, I casually asked Jesse if there was anything he could think of that I might be forgetting. It's difficult to cross-check someone's packing job via telephone, but he proved useful anyway when he mentioned bringing my passport. Yes, I would have completely forgotten - scary but true. I didn't find it in the first few minutes of looking, but wasn't too worried.

I got off the phone and began the search in earnest. After about 45 minutes I started to really worry. At about one hour I sincerely believed that I would probably not be going to Budapest, but had to continue looking in good faith. There was a horrible, sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, but I came to a place of acceptance and just figured I had to keep looking even if I didn't sleep, and if I didn't find it and missed my flight I could come home and sleep then. After 2 hours it appeared, in a suitcase I had already checked TWICE before. Ahhh, relief.

And now: to bed!

Those Changes I Mentioned

There will be a lot going on over the next few weeks. I officially gave notice at work and will be moving [a.k.a. making my way slowly] down to Portland around the end of January/beginning of February. I am excited about this decision and feel optimistic about the general direction my life is going in. But I am not really interested in any more stress and drama, so am trying to balance being proactive and persistent in following through with these plans while at the same time attempting to avoid making too many firm commitments or nailing down specific dates or things like that.

Currently I feel the theme for 2008 needs to be a restoration/pursuit of order, rhythm, balance, and peace in my life. Ideally, this will be accomplished by: taking a random trip to Hungary; returning sleep-deprived and jet-lagged to train my replacement at the job I just quit before moving to another state, unemployed and homeless, to start a new life; and diving deeper into a still-quite-new dating relationship. Good plan, eh? I thought so.

Dinner and The News

My mom made Mushroom Barley Soup for dinner tonight, and she's been talking about it for days in anticipation. It sounded okay to me when she described it before, and I liked it fine, I guess. As she was putting it away, she exclaimed, "Wow! That was just so good!"
I responded, without any intended sarcasm, "Well I am glad that you liked it so much, it tasted really...fresh..."

This evening I also came across several interesting news items:

A sad one- "What are you doing here?" man asks wife at brothel

And a weird, darkly funny one- A corpse, a check, a bizarre NYC crime

Attitude Adjustment

Today was a little weird. I tried to quit my job but only half-way succeeded, and there's another important conversation I need to have tomorrow in order to make it official. The day itself was fairly busy and I didn't get home until after 11:00 pm, and when I did I was cranky. I was frustrated about a few different things, and generally feeling a little stressed about all that I need to get done this week when I sat down to check my email before heading to bed.

A very dear friend of mine in Croatia had written me a long note, including a list of things she is thankful for:

"1) that God revealed Himself to me this summer - the best thing that could possibly happen to me

2) for my new birth and being saved by grace

3) for the Bible being a living God's word by which He is directly speaking to us

4) for having a personal relationship with God – the most important thing in my life

5) that God was creating opportunities for speaking trough me to other people

6) for being able to share my faith with friends

7) for all that Christ's death on the cross provided for me and that I can call Jesus my dear Savior

8) for great Christian music which helps me love God more, and sometimes I believe He also speaks to us through music ( currently listening Sonicflood)

9) that ''my faith is like shifting sand, so I stand on grace''

10) for feeling joy and happiness

11) that I'm never alone, but always with God on my side who cares for me and carries me through life

12) that my life finally has a meaning, and a pretty good meaning actually. No more problems concerning what would it mean to live for God's glory! :)))

13) for all that God taught me in this five months, and it's been a lot

14) that I became a member of Christ's body together with other Christians

15) for all new friends I met last year, especially Petra who is my enormous support right now

16) that I was able to forgive _____ which seemed quite impossible ( although things are anything but perfect still)

17) that God changed me not to be a bitter and angry person anymore

18) that God made me want to follow Jesus and serve Him

19) that God put His Holy Spirit in me as my Guide and Counselor

20) that God sent you in Rijeka and arranged that we meet! ;)))))

21) that no matter what happens, we would see each other in heaven

22) that my terrible and never-ending depression ended just in a second – praise the Lord!

23) that God loves me so much more than I can even understand, and nothing can separate me from the love of God

24) that in the middle of the crisis I can hold on to God, for He is always faithful and remains the same forever

25) for finding my identity in Christ

26) for great Christian literature ( I've just read Donald Miller's ''Searching for God knows what'' and am reading through ''Praying God's word'')

27) that often God leads me to read in the Bible exactly what I need to hear

28) that sometimes on Desiring God there's a topic of the day regarding the issue I'm currently dealing with

29) for finding comfort and taking refuge in God

30) that God is sovereign and in control - very comforting!

31) that I learn how to live based on what I know and not on how I feel ( that would be devastating)

32) for Baptist church on Trsat ( hopefully I would be able to attend services regularly, please pray for that!)

33) that I live in Rijeka ( there's nothing wrong with this town ;)

34) for Bible study girls

35) for verses like: Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you

36) that there's a perfect love which casts out all fear

37) that I'm not such a pessimist anymore

38) that God opened my eyes to the spiritual realities

39) that my sister was also drawn to Christ

40) for Jesus being the Way to our Heavenly Father

41) for living in the Truth

42) for having Life

43) for being forgiven and eternally safe

44) for grace being one of the most wonderful words in the world

45) for Internet, because how long we would have to wait for our letters to cross over the half of the Globe?!

46) for sermons I read or listen to

47) that God started the great changes in my heart

48) for always having hope and shining Light in every darkness

49) that God teaches me how to rely on Him and trust Him in all my circumstances

50) for beautiful sunsets I see every day through my window, which is just a glimpse of how magnificent He is

51) that ''the Earth is filled with His glory'' ( I'm singing…)

52) for simply being alive

53) for all the blessings I forgot to mention or didn't recognize as such

54) that there is obviously more things I'm thankful for than things to complain about! ;))))) Hurray!"

It was convicting and humbling to be reminded of how much I have to be thankful for - many of the same things, actually! Now it's time for bed.

General Updates

On Saturday I am headed to Hungary for the Eastern European/Russian Mid-Year conference for STINTers. Basically, all the people in Eastern Europe and Russia who are doing what I did in Croatia are going to come together for 3-4 days for some fun/rest/encouragement, and I am going to help out. I am really excited 1) to be Carolyn's handservant 24/7 for a week; 2) to see some good friends that I haven't seen/talked to in a while (Allison, Pete, the Kneeshaw family, Graham, and others); and 3) to hopefully be of some value and encouragement to people serving in places and ways that matter immensely to me.

Also, I did (somewhat deliberately) drop the 'B'-word in yesterday's post. And mine does look particularly nice in a tuxedo. But joking and crypticism aside, I am, as they say on myspace and Facebook, 'In A Relationship' and it is quite lovely. In fact, I am so all about him it's basically ridiculous.

So, life is busy and good, and change is afoot. More on that later this week.

The Wedding

1) It was really fun and laid back, but also very beautiful and trendy (in a cool, non-snobbish way). Good combination, I say.

2) I only danced a little, and it went fine.

3) Thank you Taylor for the great suggestions! Unfortunately, there was no car decorating. Just didn't work out that way.

4) Boyfriends look hot in tuxedos.

Thanking the Little People

In a recent team crossword-puzzle-solving effort, there was some controversy as to the correct spelling of the plural form of 'dwarf.' I assumed it should be spelled D-W-A-R-V-E-S, but both my assistant (assistee?) and the puzzle itself required that it be spelled D-W-A-R-F-S, so I assented.

Obviously, though, I looked it up on wikipedia later, and found that both were correct. Here is a direct quote:
"Many grammarians prefer dwarfs, many fantasists prefer dwarves."
[Imagine that taken out of context...] Basically, when referring to humans affected by dwarfism, it's 'dwarfs'; for mythical creatures: 'dwarves.'

Now you know.

Any Ideas?

Tomorrow I get to go to a wedding. I am pretty excited it about since I haven't been to a wedding in quite a while, and I expect this one to be fun. Except I do get nervous about the dancing. This is weird to some people, since I used to do ballet. But, really, when it comes to social dancing, I am atrocious. Wish me luck tomorrow!

My real question, though, is: what is the best way to 'decorate' a marital getaway car? I may or may not get to participate in any actual vandalism, but will almost certainly give some input. One time I stuck Oreo cookie halves on a car - this was both tasty and effective. Probably my favorite exit-vehicle-adornment-ceremony involved putting a live lobster inside the car, hanging from the driver's side headrest.

Anyway, I would love to hear your stories and/or suggestions, if you have any...

Holidays Bring The Family Closer Together

Last Sunday my brother, sister and I dove into a 3+ hour work party to get some things done around the house. My mom had left a list, and chief among the items included was a request to prepare the bathroom for painting. Tobin assumed responsibility for almost everything else on the list, so Kerri and I tackled this particular monster as a team.

Armed with buckets, TSP, gloves, scrub brushes, rags, bandannas/kerchiefs, coffee, and a Daft Punk CD, we were ready. First we cleared the room out. Wall hangings, decorations, and toiletries were removed unceremoniously. Then we brought in the ladder and step-stool and started scrubbing. The first 1.5 minutes weren't bad, then the suffering began.

With every scrub, pockets filled with every bad smell ever made in that bathroom were opened up. Scents burst out, creating ever bolder olfactory imprints - in our nasal passages and psyches. Flakes of moldy paint and sheet rock flew out and nestled on our faces, arms, mouths, and hair. A mixture of sweat and TSP solution pooled in elbow crooks and clavicles.

It was hot up near the ceiling, and Kerri remembers the ne'er before experienced sensation of sweat collecting under the bridge of her sunglasses (being used as protective eyewear). Getting the remaining strips of wallpaper loose wasn't very difficult, but despair set in when trying to completely eradicate remnants of mold. We got most of it off, but traces still remain. By the end we were listening to Moby's 'Natural Blues' over and over on repeat. (If you're not familiar with the song, check it out at some point.)

Even after we finished, the experience had so frayed our nerves that Kerri and I had a rare fight that left us not speaking to one another (for about 15 minutes). In the end, we survived and went on to enjoy a wonderful afternoon with some good family friends.

***Where Credit Is Due: Most of this was actually written, correction, spoken by Kerri.***

Can We Just Pretend I Put This Up Yesterday?

So I don't really have a formal list of resolutions for the new year, but there are a number of general and specific changes I am working towards. One of them is much more regular/daily-ish posting here. Not sure how long that will last, since I already missed yesterday. But I'll do my best.

That said, yesterday I happened upon this list and particularly enjoyed:

1. At least once every day I shall look steadily up at the sky and remember that I, a consciousness with a conscience, am on a planet traveling in space with wonderfully
mysterious things above and about me.

5. I shall not demean my own uniqueness by envy of others. I shall stop boring into myself to discover what psychological or social categories I might belong to. Mostly I shall simply forget about myself and do my work.

and

6. I shall open my eyes and ears. Once every day I shall simply stare at a tree, a flower, a cloud, or a person. I shall not then be concerned at all to ask what they are but simply be glad that they are. I shall joyfully allow them the mystery of what Lewis calls their "divine, magical, terrifying and ecstatic" existence.

A New Year, A New Me

Well, maybe not so much, but at least I'm back on here again. After taking the month of December off I intend to make up for lost time with colorful anecdotes, cutting edge cultural references, and/or somewhat regular posts ranging in quality from mediocre to semi-polished.

Unfortunately, at the moment I feel quite ill and my pounding headache and queasy stomach are telling me to go to bed, so I must comply.

Happy 2008! More to come tomorrow...